Those balls look pretty dangerous.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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