Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Is it because I queefed?
pop tarts are not kleenex
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
