absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
