***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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