yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
