Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
