ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
