i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize