So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
