New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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