I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
