Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize