she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
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