is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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