How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
