Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
