I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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