Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
