its not stalking. its research.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
