you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
