Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
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