A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
