i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
