3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize