I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
