is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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