we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Let's paint friendship bongs
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
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