We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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