I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
