Ambien. No doubt about it.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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