ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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