Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
