Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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