We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
