she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
3pm strippers are depressing
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Randomize
