Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
