if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
