I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
