If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
