People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
