i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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