Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
