There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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