These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize