What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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