But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
