I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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