you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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