Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
