New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
