I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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