I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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