That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
