I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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