my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
